"Welcome Moose and Squirrel," was hand-painted
In white on a silk sheet, "red" of course,
That was draped to cover a large sign.
Boris' moustache was barbed-wire grey;
Late Joe Stalin, grey as the Siberian sky,
Grey as a concrete prison complex.
Natasha's long hair was a waterfall
Of salt and pepper cascading down her shoulders.
"Ah...Marlboros," she cooed excitedly
As she opened the box that Rocky had given her.
"Real American cigarettes! Thank you, dahlinks!
And Levis too! You shouldn't have, Comrades."
"Yes, we're all COMRADES now," Boris intoned
Unctuously as he held the door of his dacha open.
Its plywood panelling looked tacky, but fresh paint
Gave it some color, and mums, a spy's favorite flower,
Nodded their heads from a recently planted garden.
After they were seated, Natasha went to the kitchen
And returned with a sterling silver samovar
Fragrant with the aroma of strong coffee.
Natasha poured Rocky a steaming cup.
While the moose admired the urn's lovely scrollwork
Rocky eyed his cup dubiously, then set it down.
Boris grinned at the squirrel's hesitancy.
"Don't worry," he assured him, "we won't poison you.
I'm a peacenik now. I'm no longer nogoodnik."
Then in a hurt tone, he added, don't you trust us?"
Rocky still looked at his cup of coffee nervously.
Natasha picked it up and took a sip from it.
"See. It safe to drink. I've even kissed it for you."
The leggy Russian held up the samovar proudly.
"A gift from Fearless Leader," she boasted.
"Where is he now?" Rocky wondered.
'He didn't handle detente too well,"
Boris apologized in a sorrowful voice.
"The Politboro finally decided that he was ill.
They shipped him off to a sanitarium.
The notorious "J" Ward. He came out diffrent man.
He raises roses now, spoils four cats and owns
A dacha near a resort on the Black Sea."
Rocky gazed about at their bare-bones home,
Cheap panelling and whitewash covered concrete.
The few pieces of furniture looked military functional
Rather than homey. Boris noticing him eyeing the place,
Spoke quickly. "Squirrel. How about trading hats?
It's an old Russian custom," the spy suggested.
Rocky examined the old fedora Boris had handed him
Skeptically. "A gesture of friendship," the spy insisted.
"Glastnost. Here, I'll even throw in a couple
Order of Lenin medals just to sweeten the pot a bit."
"Well, if it's a gesture of friendship,"
Rocky sighed, looking at the fedora dubiously.
He removed his aviator cap and handed it to the Russian.
"Here," Boris said, as he hung a high-tech camera
Around the plucky little squirrel's neck. "I have no need
For this anymore. It's my old spy camera."
He looked at it wistfully as he bid it adieu.
"It and I have snuck into a lot of places together."
The conversation turned to which was colder,
Siberia or Frostbite Falls, and to the current
Whereabouts of Captain Peter Peachfuzz.
Rocky had heard that he'd had charge of a tour boat
At Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean attraction,
But that he's lost that job when he'd run his boat aground.
The two ex-spies pledged to return the visit someday.
As squirrel and his moose buddy were leaving,
Natasha smiled sweetly and made a request.
"Would you mind putting on a flying show, Rocky?
Boris and I have always wanted to watch how you do it."
Bullwinkle picked up the game little rodent
In his right hand, ran forward with him, then hurled
Him into the air like a forward pass,
Like Brett Favre throwing a desperate "Hail Mary."
Airborne, Rocky dazzled them with a routine
Of barrel loops and Immelmann turns until,
Exhausted, he levelled out and took in the scene below him.
"Hokey Snoke, Bullwinkle," he gasped in alarm,
"I've been flying over a military base!"
Sirens were blaring and troops were grabbing rifles
And firing shots at the airborne intruder.
A well-aimed round hit the little aviator. Plummeting
Down, he landed with a "thud," as dead a squirrel
As any you've seen fried by a power transformer.
Bullwinkle stood stunned as he watched angry security
Run up to him and shackle him in handcuffs. Bewildered,
As the plywood walls were pulled down to reveal
A concrete blockhouse. When Fearless Leader arrived
He said, "Superb, Badenov. I liked the Potemkin village bit."
Boris grinned. "Search the tree rat," he suggested.
"No doubt you'll find pictures of our military base
In that spy camera that you'll see hanging from his neck.
And to think that I trusted him," Boris sighed, padding
The case against them. "Look. He even stole my fedora.
You just can't trust anyone," he concluded piously.
"But, but, but," the confused Bullwinkle stammered,
Sounding a lot like Captain Peachfuzz's tiny motorboat.
As the authorities led the squirrel's accomplice,
The shocked and thoroughly befuddled moose, past
A sign that now clearly read ""Military Base,
A No-Fly Zone. Trespassers will be Shot"
Boris was grinning. Natasha put her arms around him
And gave him a long, passionate kiss.
"Boris, my love. You're still a nogoodnik."
Then she smiled suggestively and whispered in his ear.
"One favor, dahlink. When we go to bed this evening,
Would you mind putting on squirrel's aviator cap?
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